The Dog with the Slipper

Dear Diary--

At 1 am, when the younger one was wide-the-hell-awake and having his nightly dance party, I tried to chill him out with some NetFlix.  I thought, what's the most boring shit I can think of right now?

OH.  Kipper.      (<----click that)

HAVE YOU SEEN THAT SHOW?!  I don't know what's up with it.  Truth be told, I haven't watched much.  When the older one puts it on, I try to pay attention, but I have problems hearing it over all the snoring.  Even its animators were freakin' bored with it-- there are no backgrounds, just the boring-ass characters on a field of white.  Ohhh, Kat, that's just the minimalist style of the show.  Shove it, Diary, I wasn't asking for your opinion.

I remember an episode where it's really hot outside, so Kipper wants to go swimming.  There's animation of him digging in his closet for the pool, then inflating the pool.  Then there's an extended scene where he unravels the hose and a scene where he eats ice cream.  Seriously.

The particular episode I put on last night was entitled Water Play, which I'm 100% sure is also the name of a really twisted type of porn I haven't had the pleasure of discovering.  I wouldn't recommend googling that title, is all I'm saying.

Well, the show begins with Kipper getting a phone call from a friend.  "Guess what I just got, Kipper," the friend blandly asks, while wielding a fishing pole and NOT EMOTING, EVEN SLIGHTLY.

Chlamydia?  I ask, out loud, to the iPad screen and no one in particular.

"No," the friend answers, leaving Kipper's guess a complete mystery to the viewer.

Then I laughed, maniacally, and woke up my husband. 

The End.